Being an older mum and childbirth: risk, expectation, and reality

At 39 weeks, I walked into my consultant’s office feeling proud. Nine months of pregnancy behind me, I was ready for the final act. I had imagined a natural birth, avoiding stitches, hoping my bladder would stay put, and even picturing a smooth post-birth recovery.

Then came the graph. A stark visual, presented by a male consultant, showing the risk of late stillbirth rising with maternal age. Just like that, I was labelled “high-risk.” Not in a gentle, cautious way, but with numbers that made my stomach drop.

I left the hospital feeling stunned, teary, and more than a little betrayed. Why hadn’t I known this before? A second opinion brought reassurance and kindness, yet the shadow of statistics lingered. Age had become the defining factor of how my pregnancy was managed.

The final week

The final week before my due date was tense. Induction was suggested. However, it went like this: pitocin. epidural. contractions. My controlled, serene birth plan evaporated. And then, the last ten minutes: a rush of intervention and a forceps delivery. The birth I had imagined was nothing more than a pipedream.

Reflection and learning

Afterwards, relief mingled with reflection. Did being “high-risk” influence the interventions? My stitches and tender body were reminders, but the real weight was the assumption that age meant fragility.

Being an older mum reframes how we think. And in that reframing, we find the courage to trust ourselves, no matter what the statistics say.